Tuesday, 13 October 2015

Chapter 100: All For You

Hi All,

As this is my last blog post, firstly, I just want to say a massive thank you to you all for supporting me over the past two years writing this. My Sister and friends sharing my posts on Facebook weekly and in turn, getting recognition and thanks for all I have had to contribute - so thank you :).

The main person I want to thank is my Mammy, without her love for my blog I wouldn't have carried it on. It was two years yesterday since she passed away. When I began this blog, I was lying on my bed looking outside my bedroom window one night. I was contemplating life and just how precious it is and especially with everything my Mammy was going through battling Bowel Cancer. But also, how I felt like I was in a bit of a funk. You all know about the struggle I had to get a job in Media after graduating from University as I have talked (moaned) about it plenty of times on here. So, I took charge. I thought, I'm going to grab the bull by the horns, write down my feelings and share it with the world. Never in a million years did I think people would actually enjoy reading it and relate my feelings.

I (like I'm sure many others do) talk about doing things and wanting to achieve things in life, but always make up excuses as to why I can't or probably won't ever do it. Since losing my Mom, my absolute rock and the one person I would turn to for everything, it has been a real case of fight or flight. The only option for me is to fight - because that is exactly what she did. She fought to the bitter end and always held her head high. If I could be half the woman she was, well I would feel like I achieved massively in life. When I told my Mammy about me writing a blog, she was so happy for me. When I was unemployed and I got rejected repeatedly from job interviews she was so upset for me and prayed constantly that I would get a job. When I finally got a call to say I got a job, she was watching my reaction and jumped up and down with Dad with massive smiles on their faces! Two years after when I decided to do this, I told her about and explained what I wanted to achieve from it and she of course she was completely on board. She was an avid reader, a real book worm. Although I'm not the best writer (I will hold my hands up and say that after 100 posts), she still enjoyed reading my thoughts. I only really carried on doing it, because I enjoyed seeing her reaction as she would read and I loved all of her feedback after. My Mammy only joined Facebook about two years before she passed. She wasn't particularly active on it but she would always share positive posts. After all, that's what we like to see and we like to feel motivated. The last post she put on her Facebook was a short story about a Father battling cancer. I can't find the story for love nor money and I have tried to locate it for days so you can all read it, but I will relay it to you. One day it was really rainy and the family decided to go outside in it as they just spoke about how they had never really went out and just had fun and danced in the rain. They all did and had such a lovely time. Unfortunately the Father was losing his battle and his child spoke about how unfair life was because of this. The Father said this and the story ended on this quote:

Here is another story I came across on the Sky website, reminding us all of the above.

The day my Mammy passed and for three days after, it completely chucked it down. To this day, I like to think that was her way of saying she was dancing in the rain. Although she lost the battle to Cancer with us, I like to think she is now winning in heaven.

My Mammy was the type of person who never spoke badly of anyone, she would listen to all your worries and she would never judge anyone. She was the best Wife, Mother and Grandmother anyone could ever ask for and always had so much love to give. She always had a zest for life, loved holidaying with my Dad and all of us. In fact one of the best holidays we had was when it was just me and her in France with her Sister and her family. If there is one thing I could definitely say about her, it was that she was the funniest person I have ever met. She was full of wit and would come out with the best one liners that it would have you rolling over laughing. She would always tell me how funny I was and how I should have been a comedienne, but all I ever thought was, "Well that's rich coming from you!" :).

You will all take a hit in life... I know this much. I have had my hit and I'm still working on moving forward. I know our angel is helping all of us to do just that. One person who I have found to be such an inspiration is Angelo Merendino. He wrote a book about his wife entitled, "My Wife's Battle With Breast Cancer." Please click on this link to read about his extraordinary story. During her illness, he took pictures of her every day to document her battle. Now he travels around the world to discuss this battle, a battle that is so prevalent with so many people around us. There is not one person I know who hasn't been affected by Cancer in some way. I hope and pray that one day soon, there will no longer be a battle and that there will be a cure. Please take a look at his story:

His story is so touching and it's hard not to feel his pain and relate to his words. To me, Angelo and Jen put life into perspective. The love they shared is something you want to aspire to have in your own life and it goes to show that even though Jen is no longer there in physicality with Angelo, the love and presence is and always will be with him. Just how me and my family feel about our own Jen.

What have I learnt from writing this blog? Well... I can really ramble on can't I? No in all seriousness... I read through some of my posts the other day and it seems that I give out a lot of advice to you all about life, what films to watch, what women think, what men think. But... Who am I to tell you all this? No matter what I say... you will all do whatever you want to in life. I really hope I haven't come across in a way which I am telling you what is the best thing to do, because you know what? I don't know what the hell to do myself. That's the beauty of life. Yesterday is history and tomorrow is a mystery. What you don't feel wise about today, you may wake up tomorrow with a clearer picture. What bothered you yesterday will make you stronger today and every day after. The mistake you make today will be the lesson you have learnt tomorrow. But hey... don't take my word for it... make that journey yourself.

Guys, once again, thank you so much for all of your support. I'll be forever grateful. This is the last post for "27 And... What The Hell Am I Doing?" It's been a journey. My last song is dedicated to my one and only. This is her song.

Over & Out.

Tuesday, 6 October 2015

Chapter 99: A Guide To Getting Over It

Hey All,

Hope you have all had a great week. I just want to start off by saying thank you all so much for reading my post last week and having such a great response to it. I had so much positive feedback and I'm glad that what I said touched you all in some way. I think we have all experienced times where we have been frustrated at why things don't seem to be working out well for us, but like I say, timing brings everything; it heals, it tests our patience and in the long haul, brings us everything we could have ever imagined and more. So once again, thank you for reading! It means so much to me :).

As this is my penultimate blog post, I want to talk about another thing we have all had to go through at some stage or another in our lives, and that is a break up. Let's face it, break ups are a bitch. The daunting gut feeling that the relationship may well be coming to an end. The feeling that maybe you don't want it to come to an end and that you will have no say in the other person's decisions. The having to break up with someone or being broken up with. The most horrible thing about it all, is the aftermath, How do you cope? How do you adjust to being on your own and facing single life once again? And ultimately, how do you pick yourself from the all time low you have just experienced? In your life, your will meet many people, some acquaintances, many friends and very few people who you would consider to be close to you. This may be a best friend and a lot of the time, your partner. 99.9% of the time, your best friend is your partner. You share and do everything with them, you live in each others pockets essentially... Sadly there are times when this comes to an end and you don't know what the hell to do with yourself thereafter.

I'm here to tell you now and I'm sure it's not the first time you're going to hear this but... you WILL be fine. Whether the relationship ended on mutual terms or a Doctor Foster situation occurred, although it may not seem it at the time, but worse things happen in life and bigger hurdles will come your way. It's times like these that make you a much stronger person and as my Aunt always says, "Just put it under 'E' for 'Experience' in your big book of life."

It's a hard thing to do, but try to focus on getting yourself back on track. I have tried to be friends with exes in the past and sadly this just isn't an option with longevity. In the beginning it is fine if the relationship ended amicably, but there's always the fact that you share a lot of history and there will always be bitterness if one or the other starts a new relationship with someone else. I'm not saying be rude and ignore the person if you ever see them again, but this is a big first step of moving on. Don't be a bitter pill. With every opportunity you get to see your ex again (and this is applicable to many other situations, maybe with a friend you fell out with), smile at them and ask how they're doing? You may or may not want to do this, but it is best to do it and bite the bullet. Say, "Oh hi, Mr. Ex! How are you keeping? What are you up to these days?" Say you're glad they are doing good, wish them well and be on your way. I guarantee you will feel so much better for this. Yeah you may be shaking like a leaf even talking o them, but I can assure you, you will walk away with a smile on your face and feeling like the bigger, better person.

What happened between you and that person, is between you and that person. There is no need to divulge to others the ins and outs and the whys and why nots? That is unless you are telling your family and the friends you want to explain it to after. An imperative part of looking forward is to not look back. People make mistakes and you may regret arguments and disagreements you had with that person, but it is in the past. Learn from the mistakes you made because they won't happen in the next relationship you have I can assure you that much.

When I say try to focus on yourself, I mean it. Do whatever you can to take your mind off the matter. Make plans with family, go to the gym and listen to some music, watch a television series or a film, go out with friends, book holidays, even write your feelings down. But most importantly, do not bottle things up because this does no good. Talk to your loved ones - that's what they are there for. To be a shoulder when you need it for support and an ear to lend when you want to natter on about the same thing you could well be talking about for months, or even years. I know I'm telling you all ways in which to move on but you can forgive and never forget. You won't forget that one person you felt that got you completely, or the way in which they hurt you or you hurt them. The only thing you can do, is learn, look forward and work on being a better version of yourself for that special someone that is waiting for you. It may not have worked out with you ex, but they are your ex for a reason. We all have a path in life. Sometimes we divert, sometimes we fall, but we ALWAYS get back on track.

I hope you all relate to this post as much as you did last week and I hope you all have a great week ahead.

Peace & Love.

Tuesday, 29 September 2015

Chapter 98: Trust The Timing Of Your Life

Please remember, everything happens for a reason. That job you didn't get that you were gunning for. That relationship you wanted so desperately to work but it didn't. That top you wanted but they had no more left in your size.
It's very easy to think negatively about the things you wanted so bad but it never happened for you. But remember that every opportunity that you hoped would happen and it never did, comes something else that you never expected and you know what? It's always so much better than you ever imagined. With every job you applied for and never got, a different opportunity will arise. With every relationship you wanted to work with what you thought was that special someone, someone else walks into your life and you can't picture your life without them. And with every top you wanted and you couldn't find your size, just think... you were not meant to buy that top. You were meant to save that money for something else more necessary to you. The money you would have spent on that top was meant to be spent on a train ticket to get you home when you were stranded in an unknown place.

I have wrote about timing before in previous blogs, and I always say that everything happens for a reason. The saying is so cliché, that it even pisses me off as I say it... but I truly believe it. My friend always says, "What is meant for you won't pass you by." Again, a very true saying. If you were supposed to get that job you would have got it. You probably didn't get it because someone else had more experience than you, or maybe you had too much experience but not enough qualifications.

A couple of years ago, I almost moved to New York. I umm'd and ahh'd about it for ages, but I never went. I weighed up the pros and cons and at that time... it was't right for me. I then got a promotion at work and that was my 'meant to be' situation. I wasn't meant to go to New York at that time, because something good was coming my way. Don't get me wrong, I've always wanted to live in New York - it's my favourite place in the world, but it just wasn't meant to be because the timing was wrong.

Since being single, I have been out on a few dates. Some have gone better than others. The others being completely disastrous. However, it is all experience. I don't get disheartened over it because I know my worth and the dates that haven't gone well, were not meant to. As Blair Woldorf would say:

The same goes for every job interview I had when I was unemployed. You take one beating after another and you analyse where the interview went wrong. What did you say to make the employer think you were not good enough for the role? Such as life. You can go through things over and over, but you won't get an answer. You just have to trust your gut and know that something better is coming your way. It may not be soon, it may be in a couple of months or even years... But in the meantime, try to keep positive and always improve yourself and not for anyone else, but for you. Don't sit around waiting for something to happen for you. Keep busy, do the things you enjoy, keep active, always keep learning and especially from your mistakes. But most importantly, ALWAYS... do you.
Have a great week guys and remember, what doesn't happen for you today will happen in a better form in time to come.

Big love.

Tuesday, 22 September 2015

Chapter 97: Your Annual 'Beauty Tips'. Courtesy Of Yours Truly...

Hola mis amigos!

I find it quite hilarious that I'm doing a blog on this as it isn't usually my forte... But I did one last year so I have more to add. After all, 12 months has past, so I feel I have gained a little more knowledge since then! So here goes...
  • A few people have been asking me how I get the waves in my hair lately. My hair is naturally straight/frizzy. I'll be completely honest, I have done this since I was in secondary school and I wanted the 'scrunch' look. I go to bed with a french plait in... that's right. Nothing more to it really. I take it out in the morning and add a bit of hairspray to keep the hold and hey presto! Natural looking waves that people are convinced is your natural style...
  • Eyebrows - they have been a big thing in beauty for over a year now. It seems you can't open a magazine without seeing Cara Delvigne and her eyebrows... they're... THEY'RE JUST THERE! Such amazing, thick eyebrows! I have been struggling for a while to find the right shade for my red hair, but today I went into Mac and asked what the best product was for my hair colouring. The woman was lovely and helpful and not only did she suggest I use an eyeshadow instead, but she taught me how to correctly brush on the powder with a fine structure brush. A lot of girls these day want to have the natural look, but somehow end up looking like this: This is NOT what you want. The lady told me to start from the arch of the brow and draw to into a straight line towards the ends. Afterwards, go back to the start of the brow and rather than filling it in bluntly (which I myself have been guilty of since filling in my brows), brush upwards in a straight motion towards the centre of your forehead - it looks far more natural this way!
  • I am forever painting my nails... I have a different colour on them most weeks. However, it is very easy for your nails to get discoloured over time. Even when you file and buff them, it's actually promoting the discolouring of the nail. Many think that having a base coat is the way to avoid this, but I find putting on a white nail polish underneath is far better and it makes whatever colour you intend to put on pop out even more!
  • Not only do I love painting my nails... I love having a gel/shallac on. But I went to Body Care the other day (I know, always reminds me of when I was like, 15 or something) and I had a look at their fake press on nails. I seen someone wearing them not long back and they looked like they were freshly done from the salon... Turns out they were press ons! So I bought some and oh... em... gee... they're wicked! Less hassle and no one can tell the difference (unless of course the glue is all over your fingers and you have the wrong size fake nails).
  • Finally... lip liner. My actual saviour and I can't believe I never used it before?! I literally have no top lip... It's tucked away on top of my bottom lip which sure as hell isn't much bigger. My friend used a natural liner on me followed by a light pink lip gloss and it made my lips look... well, like I had some! It's coming back I'm telling you... It's quite 90's I know, but so are the big thick eyebrows everyone is after eh?

  • Another must watch would be ALL of Kandee Johnson's videos. I have mentioned her a couple of years ago in this blog and she has some fantastic makeup videos, both for everyday and for costume! Take a look at her 'How To Contour Like A Contouring Artist' here:

And there we have it... my annual 'beauty' tips. Obviously we all have different tastes and styles when it comes to make-up and hair, so I would love to hear any tips you have to share! Please comment on the back of here, visit my Facebook or tweet me @triciabaxter.

Have a great week guys!
Big love.

P.S. Here's a good song to listen to whilst getting ready to go out ladies ;).

Tuesday, 15 September 2015

Chapter 96: Please Hold... Whilst We Push You Over The Edge

I am on a serious rampage to complain about shitty 0800/0845/0300 and the rest of these numbers who keep you on hold, for what seems like your lifetime. Raise your hand if you would rather stick a pin in your eye than listen to shitty hold music whilst you are trying to prepare yourself for a telephone battle to argue your point as to why you have been charged for something unnecessarily? I can already feel a Mexican Wave of hands raising as you read this.

I have had my fair share of hold calls in recent month's, one being from my car insurance company who not only falsely set me up to believe I have recovery cover when I had my car written off back in May, but they also proceeded to leave me feeling stressed over trying to sort out my cover and claims documents, which seemed to feel like I was being tortured. Tortured with this music nonetheless:
Little things CLEARLY don't mean a lot to you eejits!

The amount of stress my insurers put me through after my accident through phone calls alone was actually obscene. So I'm sure you will all agree with me in the following list I have provided which highlights ALLLLL the things that piss me off with unknown numbers and being on hold:
  1. PPI calls - when you answer the phone to that unknown number knowing it's going to be something stupid but you answer it anyway, only to hear a long pause and an automated voice saying, "Have you been in an accident in the past 6 months?" No I fucking haven't and where on earth have you got my number from, jackass?
  2. When an actual person rings you asking the above. You really don't want to be arsey, but you just can't help it and especially if you are waiting for an important call. Then you feel a little bad after because at the end of the day... it's their day job!
  3. When you make a call to enquire about something minor, e.g. something to do with your phone contract, and they say, "Hi can I have your account details, your security password, your first pet's name, the exact time you grew your first pube... great. How can I help you? Oh yes that's the contract department, let me put you through...""Hi can I have you account details, your security password, your first pet's name, the exact time you grew your first pube.." WHAT THE ACTUAL EFF!! I JUST SAID ALL OF THIS, NUMB SKULL!!!!!!!
  4. When they ask you to spell out your name but you have to spell it in the Phonetic Alphabet and you forget and you're like, "P for Potato, A for Arsehole, T for Twat, R for Rat's Arse, I for Icky, C for Crusty, I for Icky, A for Arsehole." And they're like, "I'm sorry I didn't get that?"
  5. When they ask for your secret password and they're like "I'm sorry your secret password is that fucking secretive that YOU don't fucking know it. Call back when you do and wait in line for another 9 years."
  6. When the automated robot that speaks to you prior to going through an adviser asks your name and you're like, "Patricia Baxter" and they're like, "Morticia Bastard?" and you're like, "PATRICIA BAXTER" and they're like "Moesha Baster?" FUCK YOU!!
  7. "Hi, you can been placed on hold... let me play you some shit music in the meantime so you might jump off a cliff instead of us having to do our job and deal with your bullshit."
  8. When you receive a fine (even though you actually were in your time at the car park, or did in fact pay that toll in advance) and you have to go through the whole rigmarole of going against it, but it is far quicker to call them (or so you think). Failing that, the second quickest thing to do is email (or so you think). Failing that you resort to sending the form... which then results in you missing the time when your fine would have cost £35 but now it costs £70. Might as well have sent fucking smoke signals to say "You're all robbing bastards. The End."
  9. When you get a new car and the key they have given you is faulty, so you order a new one on pick up and they say it will be 2 weeks and they will drop it to your location and then 2 weeks has passed and it isn't at your location and you park outside of work at a £7 a day car park only for them not to show up 2 out of the 3 times and on the 3rd time they give you another spare key even though you have one and the original spare is now no longer configured to your car so you have to spend another 2 hours of your life on the phone to Bob demanding you get reimbursed for the several times you parked outside and they never showed ONLY for them to not even do that on time so you have to ring them again because they aren't responding to your emails... Can you tell this happened to me? And this was just to get a hoop attached to the fucking key so I could attach it to my key rings. I could have resurrected a Greek God who specialist in metal work to make me one quicker.
  10. When they ask you to fill out a survey of how you found the experience and the option to say "I will never get them two hours of my life back" isn't on there...
Think Amy Schumer sums it up with this skit on her show on Comedy Central:

Let us know your 'hold' stories by responding to the back of this blog post, visiting my Facebook or tweeting me @triciabaxter. In the meantime, I think this little number suits to tone of this blog...

If only all calls went like this:

P.S. Just one more to throw in... If you're ringing up a company to complain, say, "I'm sorry can you just call my number out to me? Great can you ring me back?" Eases the pain of watching paint dry I guess...
Oh and also... If you're told you're gonna get a Teddy Meerkat... make sure you feckin get one!

I'll leave you with this:


Tuesday, 25 August 2015

Chapter 95: A Beginners Guide To Festivals

Hola Amigos!

Hope you've all had a great couple of weeks. Apologies for the delay, but I'm won't be doing blogs on a weekly basis from now on... when I find the urge to share stuff with you all, I will. Better than annoying you all every Tuesday with my bull! Ha!

This week I want to talk about Festivals! For some and not for others. But for those of you who have never been or don't think it is for you... I have to say you're missing out! Nothing better than roughing it, wearing whatever the fuck you want and not being judged because there is always some other silly fucker who looks worse, and getting up in the morning to a can of lager - pure bliss! You never seem to get a hangover either?

This blog will be solely directed at people who have never been, but mainly ladies as I would say the experience is less comfortable for women in a lot of cases. So as we are coming to the end of Festival season, and Reading/Leeds is this weekend... here are 10 things you need to consider when you go to a Festival:
  1. The toilet. Now... You have portaloos and you have long drops - both are fucking dreadful, but the latter more so. When going to both, make sure you have your own toilet roll/baby wipes with you, there will more than likely be none when you go in there and unless you want to drip dry (WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU WANT TO?!), bring some backup.
  2. Bring a fleece for the night time - no matter how hot it will be in the day, you will without a doubt, freeze your tits off at night.
  3. Bring shorts - these will be your saviour. It will more than likely be dirty, it will more than likely rain, you will give zero fucks if your legs are out. You will however if you are wearing skinny jeans and they are sticking to you and you stink more than you already do.
  4. Do NOT bring skirts, especially is you are short and are likely to be sitting on someones shoulders. I don't think I need to explain anymore.
  5. Playsuits - GREAT idea for a concert where there are secure toilets in an Arena. Bad idea if you are going to a Festival. It means if you are desperate for the toilet, you need to strip down to your undies (or if you're not wearing any, whatever) and risk some drunken fucker barging in on you, with a queue full of people watching, naked... on a loo... doing your business. NO.
  6. A shewee. Sounds fucking revolutionary, right? No. Ladies, we always talk about how amazing it would be to just take a wee wherever we want like men and not have to worry. The shewee is invented to do the same for women. But let's face it... is there a dignified way to get your nunny out and cup some cylinder on to it so you can piss in public? Steward, direct me to the long drops please, mate.
  7. We all know how great it is to get pissed and dance like fools to your fave band. But FYI don't get too pissed - you will forget the whole the experience and SEVERELY regret it. I did that when I went to see Foo Fighters and got that drunk I had one of my Converse boots pulled off me and chucked into the mosh pit. Goner.
  8. Try not to big up your favourite band too much... I went to Reading in 2012 to see The Cure and ended up falling to sleep. They didn't interact with the audience ONE bit! I also went to see Ian Brown at V in 2005. The couple in front of us said they seen him 5 times he was that good. Tthey even left after a few songs. We persevered and then legged it to The Prodigy just in time to catch Out of Space. Best 5 minutes, EVER! Can't find a Live vid from them then, but here they are performing it at Milton Keynes.
  9. If you have an old shitty phone - take it. You don't want to lose your iphone - not worth it.
  10. Don't take shit loads of photos and actually miss what you have paid £300 to do. If you want to look at pictures and videos, that's what the Internet's for. Make the most of the experience and embrace it!
  11. Take a rain mac and wellies... probably about the only practical thing I have mentioned in this list! Ha!
  12. Here's an added bonus - take talc instead of dry shampoo. It's fresher, smells nicer and less itchy. Also, you are risk of getting one that is specific to hair colour and you won't realise until you have brown shit running down your head. Can you tell this happened to me with brunette dry shampoo?
Hope that's been useful. I really think you need to go to a Fest at least ONCE in your life - such a great experience. If you have anymore tips or any awkward Festival stories to share, please contact me in the usual places on the back of here, visit my Facebook or Tweet me @triciabaxter. Here's my fave song from one of the best acts I have seen Live - ENJOY!

Have a good one peeps!
Big love.

Tuesday, 11 August 2015

Chapter 94: Wedding Joy & Celebrations

Hi Guys,

Hope you're all well and have had a great week :). Just want to start this blog off by saying a massive congratulations to my cousin Peter & his husband Glenn on their wedding last weekend! I'm so happy for you both and I think I speak for everyone when I say, we all had a BLAST! Thanks for inviting us all and thanks for such fond memories that we will always look back on and cherish. Hopefully this message is a bit more sentimental than the drunken one I left in your book! Love you both loads! Xxx

Weddings are such a beautiful time to celebrate two people finding each other and discovering what true love and happiness feels like. Knowing that a person has found that significant other that completes them, betters them and enhances them in every way possible. When my cousin and his husband said their speeches last weekend, I was so moved. At weddings you feel the love in the ceremony, the speeches and what better way to celebrate this than by getting together and embracing the day with the addition of alcohol, a dancefloor, and a shiny disco ball!

Now... I won't lie, I got quite merry and it's always a mixed blessing when you are tagged in photos on Facebook the next day or worse than that, people relay you the stories. What you drank, what you did, that couple of times you fell over, the list goes on! But God did I have fun. I like to think my party trick is that I'm a lightweight... Yeah no that's not my party trick. But basically ensuring everyone else is having a laugh (even if it is at my expense). That's what a celebration is for isn't it? Having fun! However, the next day isn't so fun.

It's always the way though, you start off so elegant, you feel like you've scrubbed up well from your normal everyday work attire and you are excited to see the vows and embrace the couples special day. Then... the reception begins - you know how it goes, you mingle, you're chatting away and before you know it, you've had 5 glasses of prosecco before you have even sat down to your 3 course meal where there is also unlimited amount of alcohol being filled up whilst you're munching away.

With this in mind, here's a lost of things you should NOT do as a wedding guest:

  1. Drink too much when meeting the family and friends the night before. Do yourself a favour - be as fresh as you can for the big day!
  2. Try to suss out who is wearing what before the wedding and do NOT wear anything similar to it. Turning up to a wedding in the same outfit is not ideal.
  3. Be late - just disrespectful.
  4. Turn up empty handed - not... on.
  5. Look at the free bar and jump at the opportunity of having 4 Porn Star Martini's before you have had a substantial meal.
  6. Relay embarrassing stories about yourself when you are on the way, only for someone to tell you the next day, "You remember what you said last night?" only for you to agree and thoroughly shake your head at the same time.
  7. Write in the wedding book at the end of the night. No, just no. Make sure you grab your mitts on that book either at the beginning of the night or if you plan to drink soda water all night. Believe me, I'm talking from experience.
  8. Make a show of yourself - stop trying to out do the couple. It's THEIR day, not yours.
  9. If you haven't been asked to do a speech don't even try to jump in and do one.
  10. Bring an extra person along who wasn't invited. Unless the invitation say "plus one", don't do it?!
  11. Try and match make all the single people. We get it, it's a wedding, would be cool to say a couple met at a wedding and ended up living happily ever after. But from a single person, please don't.
  12. If you've been invited along last minute and know no one, don't introduce yourself as Vince Vaughn. I've done this.

That's just a small list. Take it in and absorb it for future reference!

Anyways, I will love you and leave you! Peter and Glenn, can you get married next weekend so we can do it all over again?! :D.

Do any of you have any weddings coming up? What's your most memorable wedding guest stories? Let me know on the back of here, visit my Facebook page or tweet me @triciabaxter.

And one more thing, try to avoid Karaoke if you know this might happen:

Big love
T. x